Few of us who follow a pagan way of living were born into a magickal home. One by one, we found our spiritual paths on our own. Within our Wild Circle discussion group, many were raised in Christian households, some by agnostics, and others as reformed Jews. For some of us, being pagan is simply a process of exploring the wonder of life that we began as children. TinneIvy shares that she has, "...been in the process of becoming pagan since I was a little girl who played and hid in the ferns behind our house in the company of faeries." For others, paganism was a discovery made after decades of living. "I formally came to paganism at age 47," Runi writes. "At least that was when I began to acknowledge to myself and others that I am a pagan."
The question was raised as to whether a person could be born pagan, that the spiritual quest was in learning and growth, but that the love of Nature and Spirit was present from birth. Briarmoon summed up the conversation when she wrote, "I firmly believe that every child is born pagan, then they are "ruined" by society forcing them to conform. Most small children have no shame about running around nude, being friends with anybody that will play with them, questioning everything (and everyone) around them, etc. until they learn that it's not right to be naked, some children are not to be played with, or that this is what is right so behave this way or be punished." She continued, adding, "Now I realize that children must be taught right from wrong and how to act to be able to function in society, but do we need to crush their spirits in doing so?"
And this was a point that was brought up again and again. Choosing a pagan path isn't a frivolous endeavor. Many of us have sacrificed a great deal to walk this path. Susan echoed many of our experiences when she shared, "I've had many arguments with [my mom] about my beliefs... and I think she's come to understand that if I'm not an evil person, my beliefs certainly couldn't be." Winter, who grew up with an interest in paganism while being raised in a Christian household added, "Things got so bad that my parents actually had the elders of their church lay hands on me and tried to cast demons out of me, sure that my interest in the occult had a supernatural influence."
For many of us, finally choosing a pagan path was a way of embracing the things we've always believed. Many of us found we related to Ahneke when she wrote, " I can remember the connection to Mother Earth my entire life." Arachweb shared, "I found that this path took me right back to where I had always found my strength: in the sacredness of the nature." And when Winter finally told his mother that he was a practicing witch, without pause she simply asked, "Haven't you always been one?"
Concerns
Each of us had concerns when we chose to live a pagan life. Like many of us, Natasha carefully explored her path. "Initially, I just started looking on the net for goddess web sites," she wrote, "which naturally led me to Wicca and witchcraft. I immediately found a connection there, but I was very cautious. I didn't want to rush into anything that may not be right for me."
The other concern that the majority of the group could relate to was that our families would condemn us for our beliefs. "I remember only having one concern at first," Ahneke wrote. "That was acceptance by my husband of my path." Rowen Ravenfeather shared that, "When I first got started I had the fear of so many of you that I had to hide this new found knowledge from my family, I was only 12 and knew that my grandmother would understand but wasn't sure about the rest of my family. Some of this still isn't resolved as my mother doesn't know." As focused as paganism is on life as a whole, it's very difficult for those of us who have chosen this spiritual path to know that our families, perhaps the largest part of our lives, won't accept our beliefs. This importance came into focus when Vestalin wrote, "My entire family is very open to all of this, and that makes for a much happier life for my kids."
A Way of Life
Pagan spirituality is not something that is picked up and set down again, but a way of life. It is an expression of how we see the world, of what we believe, and the things that are truly important to those of us who walk this path. Each day, we try to incorporate our beliefs into our individual lifestyles. Some of the ways we live our beliefs are simple, as when Luna shared, "I think that the main way I express my beliefs on a daily basis is through the way I try to treat others." Some of us, such as Ajyssa, start our day with, "... short morning meditations/greetings to the God and Goddess," while others are like Toadie who shared, "I greet every morning... with a gladness for the beauty of light. I spend time every day (usual in multiple breaks) out in nature, noticing things, taking in what is happening and really thinking about it."
Like Ahneke, we strive to see the sacred in every moment of our lives. "I am in awe of the miracle of the universe and it's diversity and power. And at the same time I am aware that amongst all of it I am unique. It's a feeling of humility and pride at the same time. It has empowered me in every aspect of my life. In my relationship with Divinity and with those who share this physical plane. It molds my every behavior and constantly comforts me." But it was Gavangar who summed up the pagan approach to living when he wrote, "Loving the Goddess and God has become such a part of me that every act I do is influenced by this. I could list all of the things I feel are positive and affirmative but there really is no need. Every moment of every day is spent in a form of worship and adoration and gratitude. This, in turn, empowers me which, in its turn, allows me to love and honor even more."
A New Perspective
As with any path, those of us who chose to live a pagan life began with certain preconceived ideas about what it would mean to be pagan, about where our paths would lead. Artemis shared that, "When I first began, I felt that there were supposed to be all these 'secrets' that would eventually be revealed to me and they would be things I never would have dreamed of before. As I have traveled along in my path, the only surprise has been that there are no great mysteries. I have found that much of what is practiced are the things I already know and feel, but never knew that others did. Much of what I consider to be the 'True Mysteries' are those things that the God/dess have revealed to me about myself. No man or woman could do that for me, it is a lesson that I am being taught by the Divine Mother and Father."
Sunshyne presented a snapshot of this journey when she wrote, "When I first learned there was actually a name for what I believed, I was afraid of it because of all the things I had been taught growing up. Once I explored it I felt as though I had come home. Then I found myself thinking that now it would be easy to find all the "answers," because someone must have them just like my mother always said she did! I had no idea how many different paths there were! I now have learned that only I can find my own answers [is] through study, asking questions and exploring what's inside of me." As Trish stated so concisely, "It wasn't really that my life changed, I just found meaning to what I had always felt."